Kirk/Spock Advent Calendar 2006

Just Once

by T'Mara; rated NC-17
Summary: This Christmas, everyone seems intent on getting Spock to try something new.
Disclaimer: Paramount/Viacom, blah blah. No infringement intended, no money being made.
FB: smesugar @ aol.com

Looking over at the beautiful dark skinned woman who usually held his attention during these functions, he was again engaged by her aura of sensual confidence. She was stunning in a long, red silk dress which hugged her curves in a most provocative way.

Now...Uhura was notorious for pulling him into center stage and for that reason alone, he tried to stay as far away from her as possible during these social gatherings. Being thrust into center stage made him terribly uncomfortable. But he could admit to himself, that watching her 'work the room' so to speak, was always fascinating.

He on the other hand, preferred to stay invisible in this type of situation. Give him a puzzle, an equation or a formula to solve and he stood tall and confident in his abilities to overcome the problem. Give him center stage at a party full of humans and he was gawky, awkward and stunted in his ability to participate. No matter the situation, he would always end up leaving the room feeling (another inward cringe) foolish.

Therefore...he just watched. And watching had its own rewards. Uhura's head fell back as she laughed at some joke that Mr. Scott had made. Her throaty laugh filled the room and cascaded over everyone to somehow make the air in the room seem lighter. Without a doubt, she was everything, socially, that Spock would have wanted to be if he were human. He admired her greatly.

Scanning further to the left, he saw McCoy standing by the punch bowl, his arm around Lieutenant Barrows and they were looking into each others eyes as if sharing a secret, a soft smirk across their lips. The thought of secrets made Spock scan the remainder of the room for his own personal secret. But he wasn't here. Reaching inward for the time, Spock frowned slightly. It was well past 1900 hours and he was still not here. What could be keeping him?

Spock shifted in his seat. If Jim was not coming, there was no real reason for him to remain. It was odd however, since the main reason that he had attended tonight was at Jim's insistence that he participate. He remembered their conversation in detail.

Striding out of the turbolift at his Captain's side, Jim had turned to him and asked, "Are you going to the Christmas party tonight?"

Spock had stiffened a bit at the question. Pulling his arms back to clasp them behind his back, he had responded, "I had not planned to attend, Captain. I have a project on Barian Waves that I wish to complete within the next two days."

Jim had then come to a complete halt in the middle of the passageway and turned to stand within inches of Spock's body. Smiling up at him, his eyes a fascinating study of gold and green, Jim put a hand on his shoulder and said, "Aw, come on Spock."

Spock felt a flush of heat go through him from the contact and although every instinct he had urged him to move out from beneath the hand, he could not find the strength to do so. The hand on his shoulder tightened as the smile on his Captain's lips widened and the current running through Spock flew up several notches. Spock could not help that he was a touch telepath. He could not help opening himself up to the current running though to him from his Captain. Or was it more like he could not stand not to reach into the brightness that he knew was James Kirk. They had melded several times for reasons of duty but each time that Spock had immersed himself in his Captain's mind, he had come away breathless at the beautifully complex fire that was his commanding officer. // I want him there, // came through to him now from Jim.

"Captain," Spock started, battling to pull back and raise his shields. This type of familiarity with his commanding officer was inappropriate for a Vulcan. "There is no logical reason for attending a function that carries with it emotional connotations for an event that happened in Earth's ancient past." Then lifting one superior eyebrow he added, "Vulcan's do not celebrate Christmas."

Still holding him and still smiling, Jim said softly, "Spock, you're half human. Didn't your mother ever celebrate Christmas?"

Ah, a request for information. Now here, Spock was on much firmer ground. "My mother became Vulcan on the day that she accepted and bonded with my father. She endeavored to familiarize me with information on what Christmas was, which I found truly fascinating from a purely historical perspective, but she did not participate in the rituals involved in the observance of that holiday."

Jim frowned at this and released his friends shoulder. Spock wasn't sure if he was relieved at the lack of continued physical contact or disappointed. Either way, he would have to meditate on it later. Disbelief written all over his features, Jim moved a few inches closer and asked, "Never?"

Jim looked away then and started back toward their quarters, his shadow following once again at his side. "Well, that's just dumb!" Jim said forcefully.

It was Spock's turn to come to a dead stop in the middle of the passageway. He could not keep indignation out of his voice as he said, "I beg your pardon?"

Jim strode back to him and then look up at him once again, he eyes dancing with light, as he said, "No, Mister, I won't pardon you, no matter how much you beg."

Spock sighed heavily with impatience and the end result was that Jim's head fell back and he laughed. It was a full, joyful laugh and it had the unsettling effect of tightening Spock's heart in his side. Much like Uhura's laugh, Jim's lightened the air but it also brought a certain lightness to Spock's head.

He had grown over the last few years to appreciate Jim's laughter and the effect it had on him. He had even gone so far as to try at times, to incite that laughter. He comforted himself every time afterwards by reminding himself that even his father was known to attempt humor at times. It was after all, an intriguing study in what responses one could elicit from a human, when one turned a phrase in just the right way. It was an intellectual challenge of sorts to attempt to come up with a reply or facial expression that was sufficiently subtle and yet humorous. One of Spock's favorite adversaries in what was called 'a battle of wits' was McCoy but in the end, whether he chose to acknowledge it or not, his main motivation for attempting humor was to make his Captain laugh.

"Seriously," Jim continued his features growing solemn. "What ever happened to IDIC? Aren't you folks supposed to embrace our differences and all that?"

Jim's eyes went an astonishing shade of gold at that and Spock sensed triumph from his Captain. "Well, then," Jim said slowly taking his shoulder in his hand once more, "how can you truly practice IDIC if you spend all your time locked up in your lab?"

"Jim," Spock said as he realized that his Captain was attempting to corner him. "I do not, as you say 'stay locked up in my lab'. At times I share meals with the crew; I play chess with you, I..."

Jim dismissed his words with a wave of his hand. "Yeah, Spock but that's just paltry little bits of humanity. Think of what a fascinating study you could do, if you spent more time around us. Really dug in and tried to learn about us. Every once in a while Spock, you have to take big bites of humanity if you ever want to truly understand us."

Spock could see that Jim was going to be adamant about his attending the Christmas party. That was one of the things that he admired about his Captain. Once he made his mind up that he wanted something, he was relentless about getting it. It was one of the traits that made him such a good leader and it had saved all their lives countless times. He was driven to succeed no matter what the odds were of losing; he simply refused to lose.

Reluctantly Spock nodded and said, "Very well, Captain. I will concede your point and attend tonight's function."

Jim practically radiated with victory. He pulled himself up very straight and with a satisfied smile he said, "Great!" as he started into his quarters. Then without pausing he added over his shoulder, "Oh and by the way First Officer, no uniform tonight."

If Spock had been human, he would have groaned. No uniform? He stood several moments in the corridor, trying to discern how he had allowed himself to be so neatly maneuvered into this position.

Pulling yet another item from his drawer, he took a deep breath and told himself that he must meditate before leaving for the party. This level of emotion was simply unacceptable. Looking down at the jade tunic in his hands, he considered it for a moment and then tossed it aside. It was something his mother had given him when she had last visited during their trip to Babel. He remembered that he had disapproved of her choice in color. This particular shade of green on a Vulcan was considered a symbol of passion, since it so closely resembled the color of Vulcan blood. But his mother, like his commanding officer, had an uncanny knack for getting him to agree to do things that he would not normally do and so, she had gotten him to accept it.

Glancing toward the tunic again, he took it up and reconsidered it. It did have elegantly woven pattern in gold around the neck, the sleeves and the hem. Not to mention that green, if he remembered correctly, was one of the colors usually associated with this particular holiday. Maybe it would be appropriate. And after further consideration, Spock decided that no one at the function would be aware of the underlying nuances of a Vulcan in a tunic of this shade. Decision made, Spock opened a second drawer and pulled out a pair of black dress slacks that he had not worn in years. Sliding into them he was bit alarmed to find that while they still fit, they were now quite snug around his thighs and buttocks. Apparently, he had gained muscle mass since he had last worn them. For a moment, he considered opting for his uniform pants but then dismissed the idea. Jim had expressly told him "no uniform" and he was sure that this edict extended to trousers. With another sigh he pulled on his boots and then pulled the linen tunic over his head. Moving toward the mirror, he brushed his bangs into place and then regarded his reflection dispassionately. He looked acceptable.

Taking a moment to gather his thoughts, he reached inwardly for the time. He determined that he had approximately fifteen minutes to meditate. He would take advantage of that time and center himself, before attending the party.

Spock met his Captain's smile with a nod. "Captain, I was beginning to think that you had decided not to attend the function."

"No," Jim said as he slid down onto the couch next to Spock. He took a sip of the drink in his hand and then leaned back. "I had some things to take care of before I could come." Turning slightly toward Spock, he added, "And by the way, call me Jim. We're off duty, you know?"

Jim searched Spock's eyes for a few breathless moments, making him slightly uncomfortable and then proceeded to scan his First Officer from head to foot. If Spock had been human, he would have squirmed. In fact, mentally, he felt himself squeeze tight with unease. Meeting his eyes once again, Jim said softly, "That color suites you Spock."

Try as he might, Spock could not prevent the flush that he was sure came over his features or the heat that infused his belly at Jim's compliment. Clearing his suddenly clogged throat, Spock could only say, "I am glad that you approve."

Nodding and then giving him one of his trademark sensuous grins, Jim responded, "I do."

Alarms when off in Spock's head. He was knowledgeable enough about human behavior to see his Captain's responses as overly familiar. He had certainly had ample opportunity, to watch Jim in pursuit of female companions, to recognize the techniques that he used when attempting a seduction. That he appeared to now be focusing those techniques on Spock was both disturbing and enticing all at the same time. Sure that he was somehow misreading his Captain, Spock looked away and into the crowd for some means of distracting them both.

"It appears," Spock said dryly, "that Doctor McCoy has been successful once again in overindulging in alcoholic beverages."

Turning toward the crowd, Jim saw physician leaning heavily on his date. "It sure does."

Relieved to no longer be the focus of Jim's attention, Spock relaxed. Jim could not possibly understand the effect that his words and behavior had on his First Officer. Admonishing himself for his overreaction, Spock glanced toward Uhura again and to his surprise found her staring back at him with an impish grin on her face. Spock looked away quickly and attempted to squeeze himself back into the couch. But it was to no avail. Several seconds later, she was standing before him with one hand on her hip and the other stretched out in his direction. Looking into her eyes, he raised a questioning eyebrow.

Still smiling sweetly, she looked over at Jim and then turned back to him. "Mr. Spock, I happen to know for a fact that Vulcans do indeed dance. And according to your mother, who by the way is an incredible woman, you were taught, as is proper for an Ambassador's son, to dance at an early age."

The sound of a muffled snort met his ears then and he looked over to find Jim covering his mouth in an unsuccessful attempt to hide a laugh. Without conscious violation, Spock's eyes narrowed. Jim raised his hand at the glare and said, "Well, don't look at me. She's got you."

Glancing back up at Uhura, Spock tried for his best highly tolerant tone and said, "While what you say is true..."

Interrupting him, she sat on the arm of the couch and leaned into him. "Mr. Spock, for someone so intent on appreciating diversity, you sure can be a stick in the mud."

Spock's eyebrows shot straight up past his bangs. Why was it that suddenly, everyone was aimed at using his ideals as a means of getting their way? Straightening, he started to rise up off the couch to leave, when he felt Jim's hand brush his arm. "Spock, hold on." Reluctantly he sat back and met Jim's soft gaze; the hand on his arm warming him inside and out. Leaning forward slightly, Jim looked into his eyes and said, "Just once Spock, try it. Just once."

//Refuse, // a stern voice said in his head. But he could not refuse this man anything. He could not even remember a time when he could. Turning back toward Uhura, who was still leaning back on the arm of the couch, Spock took a deep breath and accepted. "Very well."

Standing, he took her arm in his and walked to the center of the dance floor, all the while admonishing himself for allowing Jim to talk him into dancing. No doubt, he was about to make a spectacle of himself. Once they were in the middle of the dance floor, he turned Uhura in his arms and pulling her close, he began to sway to the music. She followed him perfectly as she lifted her hands to place them on his shoulders. Leading her in slow circles, after several moments, Spock began to relax. This was after all, somewhat physically and intellectually pleasing. He had not danced in several years and the rhythm of their movements along with the music was in many ways soothing. Glancing down at his partner, he found her scanning him just as Jim had, from head to foot. Curiosity made him lower his shields. What was she thinking at this moment? What did she see when she looked at him?

//Damn sugar, you sure are fine. I could eat you...// and Spock slammed his shields back into place. Dark green stained his cheeks as he pulled back from Uhura. His movement caused her to look up and then it was her turn to blush. With a giggle she said, "Aw, damn, Spock, I'm sorry. I forgot for a second there that you're a touch telepath."

When he didn't respond, she continued, "I'm only human after all," she concluded with a shrug of her shoulders and a smile.

Despite his shock at her thoughts moments before, he found that he was flattered by her appraisal and his affection for her won out over his initial responses. An upturn of the corners of his mouth told Uhura that they were fine.

Leaning closer, she whispered in his ear, "Besides, I'm not the only one who thinks you're a piece of eye candy."

Rolling her eyes Uhura laughed and then said, "You know, hot. Good looking. Attractive."

Was there no end to the shocks that he would have to endure tonight? "Miss Uhura, I seriously doubt..."

Interrupting him yet again, she said in her best sultry voice, "Don't you 'Miss Uhura' me, sugar. Just take a look around if you don't believe me."

Spock raised his head and scanned the room. It seemed as if almost everyone's eyes were on them. Stiffening, he started to release his partner. With surprising strength, she put her arms around his waist and pulled him against her. His first reaction was to consider yanking himself out of her arms. But that would only serve to make more of spectacle out of them than they were already. He gazed down at her sternly and met serious brown eyes. "Relax," she said softly. "Just relax."

"Lieutenant," he said, his voice brimming with resentment. "You are in serious danger of overstepping your bounds."

She continued to bore into his eyes and said, "Just listen to me for a minute, okay?" When he didn't respond but only continued to glare at her in disapproval, she said, "I know you don't like the attention. You sit in a corner, day after day, and I watch you try to be invisible. Especially in a crowd. But no matter what you do, Spock, you're going to get the attention."

Her words brought up a wellspring of frustration that he had hardly realized was there. "Why?" he asked.

Smiling gently, as they continued to move to the music, she said, "Because you're you."

"Spock, everything about you gets our attention. Your brains, your honor, your loyalty and your looks, are all irresistible to us. You're an enigma and humans can't resist an enigma. There is this powerful beauty that you radiate that, we just can't help but be drawn to."

Nodding solemnly he said, "I think I understand but I believe that it is much more about the fact that I am different that makes me stand out."

"Of course it is, Spock. But different is not a nasty word. Someone along the way made you feel like your difference was a negative thing and it's not. Your difference is more than the fact that you are a half Vulcan, half human among a ship full of humans, it's about the fact that you're one hell of an incredible package."

Giving her his half smile once again, he said, "Miss Uhura, I appreciate your generous words."

"Hell, Spock," she said leaning into his ear. "I'm not being generous. I'm being honest. Look around sugar. What you see in their eyes isn't shock or disgust, its curiosity and appreciation."

Glancing around once again at everyone's faces, Spock had to admit that there appeared to be some validity to her words. The music changed then from a soft melody to a seductive Andorian beat and with a devilish grin Uhura said, "Now, let's show them how it's done."

With this, she turned in his arms and swayed back into him. Moving her hips in a seductive manner, she began to slide across his body. He released her waist and then allowed her to turn around in his arm, as she slid all the way to the tips of his fingers and then ducked back behind him, all the while caressing his shoulders and back with her hands.

It was amazing to him, the self confidence that he had taken from her words. Still looking into the crowd, Spock tightened the muscles in his arms and slid them back and up along her sides, as she undulated against him from behind. His attention was caught by some movement in the corner of his eye and he came face to face with James Kirk, who'd straightened on the couch. He watched with fascination as his Captain's eyes widened in surprise and then narrowed into glittering slits.

At first he had justified his actions by telling himself that it was a Captain's duty to know as much about his crew as possible, but in recent months that excuse had fallen flat. The truth of the matter was that Jim was attracted to his First Officer and that attraction grew stronger with each passing day. Spock had changed since he'd first come onboard. He'd finally relaxed in Jim's presence and had even come to joke with his Captain from time to time. The changes in Spock were subtle but to Jim they were like a beacon, drawing him further and further into his First Officer's light.

Watching Spock sway to the rhythm of the music, Jim admired his body. Those tight black pants left little to the imagination. He'd never really been attracted to a man before but Lord knew if he was going to be, this one was it. He was tall and wiry, his muscles bunching underneath the tunic as he moved gracefully around the room. Jim had seen men before that he'd considered somewhat attractive but there was something about Spock, which he found simply alluring. And he knew that it wasn't just a physical attraction. This man had somehow become his other half. The phrase 'soul mate' came to him unbidden. And yet, that is what Spock was to him. He was a cascade of cool logic for his Captain's fire.

But there was also a quality of barely concealed passion in Spock. It was as if underneath the layers of calm stoicism, there lived a burning need that Spock kept hidden. He'd told himself time and time again, that it was just his imagination. But try as he might, he couldn't shake the feeling that if he could just chip way enough at Spock's reserve, he would find that need and it would bring them both unimaginable fire.

Spock's face during Pon Farr came to him again. It had been a glimpse of what lay beneath the chilly Vulcan veneer. His eyes had burned black on the sands of Vulcan and he had been breathtaking. He knew that Spock had been unsettled by what had happened there, but Jim could only look back on those events and thank the gods that he'd been given the opportunity to see just how passionate his First Officer could be. Well that and the fact that his presence had kept Spock from being bonded to that woman. In fact, it had been that experience that had finally forced Jim to admit to himself, his attraction to his Exec.

Scotty came over and dropped heavily onto the couch next to him. Turning to Jim, he slurred, "Well, will you look at that?" nodding toward the couple in the middle of the dance floor. Following his gaze Jim nodded, "Yeah, who would have thought Spock could dance like that." Of course, he acknowledged to himself, he'd known. There was no way that a man as naturally graceful and elegant as his First Officer, would not be able to dance well.

As they watched the beat of the music changed. Jim recognized the Andorian mating beat and watched for Spock and Uhura to end their dance. Instead, Uhura gave Spock a devilish grin and then he lifted his arms and she began to gyrate against him. There was no way that Spock was going to continue with this dance in front of a rec room full of crew members; but to Jim's shock, he did. He led her around behind him, swaying his hips to meet hers, with his hands pulled back behind him to caress her sides and then he turned slightly to look right into Jim's eyes. His First Officer's soft brown eyes had gone black and there were no other words for it, they sizzled.

Jim felt his own gaze narrow at the sight and he couldn't help the jealously that overcame him as he watched Uhura stroke Spock's hips and shoulders. Spock turned away then and seemed to focus all his attention on his dance partner. Everyone in the room had stopped to watch them. When Uhura had worked her way back to sway against Spock's chest, he took her by the waist and brought her body against his. Then, at the music's crescendo, he lifted her up effortlessly, leaned back and then seductively let her slid down his strong narrow frame.

The entire room went still. The D.J. didn't even move on to another tune. Several beats passed and then the room suddenly shook with thunderous applause and cheers. Jim stood beside Scotty and couldn't even pull himself away from the scene before him enough to clap. Spock and Uhura stood in the center of the room and for a split second, as she looked up at him with a wide smile on her face, Spock returned it. It was a smile that Jim had only seen once, after Vulcan and Pon Farr and it took his breath away. Then just as quickly as it had appeared it was gone and Spock straightened his tunic, took Uhura's arm and led her back toward the couch.

As the couple walked up to Jim and Scotty, McCoy sauntered over. "Holy shit, Spock! That was one hell of a show!"

Prim and proper, Spock replied, "I appreciate the compliment doctor, if that is indeed what it was?"

McCoy, who'd had entirely too many cups of punch at this point, forgot about his rivalry with Spock and slapped his shoulder. "Hell, yes, that was compliment! Who'da thought you could move like that."

Spock nodded once and then turned to Jim who continued to stare at him. "Captain?"

Jim remembered where he was, shook his head and then said, "Um, yeah, Spock. That was great."

Spock nodded again and then turned away. "Gentlemen, if you will excuse me, I will go retrieve something refreshing for myself and my lovely dance partner," and with that said, he walked away. Everyone in their group turned to watch him go with amazement and admiration in their eyes.

As soon as he was out of earshot, Jim turned to Uhura and found that she was studying him with an inquisitive look. "What?" he asked defensively.

Scotty slide up next to her and placing an arm around her shoulders said, "Now lass, can you tell me how you managed to get our stiff, logical Mr. Spock to move like that?"

Still smiling, she winked at the Captain and said demurely, "I just asked him to. He's quite talented; wouldn't you say, Captain?"

Shaking his head in disbelief Jim said softly, glancing in the direction that Spock had gone, "I'll say."

Uhura's features changed then, a flush coming over her cheeks in anger. "Don't you dare say anything to him about it!" she said forcefully.

"What?" McCoy said, "You've got to be kidding. I have to give him a hard time about it. He'd expect it, darling."

Uhura leaned into McCoy, jabbed a long nail into his chest and said, "If I hear that you picked on him about this, I'll wipe the deck with you, mister."

She glared at him for a few moments longer and then her features softened back into a smile. "Okay."

Jim watched the interaction with a growing sense of unease. What was going on here? Why was Uhura defending Spock so adamantly? Was there something going on between them? // Not that it's any of your business, Tomcat, // he told himself. Still, he didn't like it. He didn't like it one little bit.

Turning back the way Spock had gone; he saw that his First Officer was returning. Every few paces, someone would stop him to say something. Spock would listen, nod and then walk on.

Walking back up to the group, Spock handed Uhura a cup of punch and then turned to stand by Jim's side. Uhura raised her cup and said, "Merry Christmas."

Everyone raised their glasses and took a drink. Spock swallowed a sip of his drink and then gave a tiny grimace. "Spock," Jim said softly into his ear, "you probably shouldn't. It's spiked."

Turning to within an inch of Jim's face, Spock met his eyes and said, "I am well aware of that Captain," before he turned away to watch the festivities.

As if he had been waiting all night for that question, Spock turned those chocolate eyes on him and gave an immediate, "Yes."

Rotating with some difficult due to the lightness in his head, Jim started toward the exit. McCoy stopped him, his arm around Barrows and asked, "Where the hell ya going so soon, Jim?"

Dragging himself away from his plans, Jim leaned into him and said in his ear, "Home, Bones."

McCoy grinned from ear to ear and then patted them both on the shoulder. "Well...ya'll have fun now, ya hear?"

As Jim made his way back to their quarters, he felt Spock across every inch of his body. It was strange how that was true. He was tipsy but he wasn't drunk. As he walked along, he took a look at Spock and tried to determine whether or not his First Officer was inebriated. He'd had at least three cups of punch and he wondered what effect that amount of alcohol would have on the Vulcan's system; especially considering that he didn't normally drink.

He found it both disquieting and exhilarating to have to look up into Spock's eyes. Spock on the other hand was an absolute riot of emotions inside. He did not know if it was the alcohol that he had consumed or the look in his commanding officer's tawny eyes, but his heart was pounding in his side and he could not seem to catch his breath. He wondered and not for the first time, if Jim knew the effect that his closeness had on him. How could he not? // Can he see that I am completely enamored with him? //

The first time that Spock had felt desire for his Captain was on that dreadful day, on the sands of Vulcan. In his Pon Farr induced haze; Spock had wanted to make Jim submit to him. He had wanted to make Jim stop fighting him and just lie still. He had wanted to press him into the ground with his body and fill himself with his Captain's mind. Instead of wanting T'Pring, which was fitting, he had wanted to cling to the scent of salt and iron that was James Kirk. The total devastation that he had felt afterwards, thinking that he had killed his Captain, had only forced him to become clearer about what this man meant to him. His reaction at seeing that Jim was still alive had only been a totally honest one.

As the doors to his quarters slide open, Spock felt his heart beat quicken. But along with the terribly sweet feeling of euphoria that Jim caused in him, he heard warning bells go off in his head. In his current state of awareness, the last thing that he needed was to be alone with Jim. He must not let his Captain know how he felt. Looking over at his commanding officer, he realized that that was exactly what Jim wanted. His Captain seemed determined to follow him in. He paused at the entrance and turned back. "Jim...it was a most interesting evening. I appreciate your invitation."

Jim leaned against the door jam and met his eyes, his arms folded across his chest. "Oh, First Officer, the evening isn't over yet."

Held captive by Jim's voice and the sultry smile that played across his lips, Spock fought to contain his thoughts and forcibly restrained his imagination from running wild. Lifting an expected eyebrow he said, "Indeed?"

Spock shrugged in forced casualness and walked into his cabin. The heat welcomed him home and he felt at once more comfortable. Striding toward his desk, he was suddenly assailed by an unfamiliar scent. Nostrils flaring, he turned to scan the room. There was something in the air that he could not quite identify. Taking a deeper breath and forgetting about his commanding officer behind him, his nose led him to the corner of his sleeping alcove. And much to his surprise, there stood a tree. It was approximately 5.6 feet tall and it appeared to be a conifer with round baubles attached to it, sitting in the corner opposite his bunk.

Spock turned startled eyes back at his Captain. Jim was standing at the entrance to his sleeping area and looking at him with an incredibly soft smile on his face. Spock met his eyes and said, "I do not understand."

Straightening, Jim walked past him to kneel in front of the tree. He dug beneath the lower branches for a few moments and then turned back to Spock, his hand outstretched. "Come here, Spock."

Spock obeyed out of overwhelming curiosity. He wanted to see what his Captain was going to do next. He walked up to him and when he got close enough, Jim took his hand. He considered for a moment, pulling away. It was unspeakably intimate to be standing so close to him like this, holding his hand. He felt a cool thumb caress his knuckles and it made him tremble. With a gentle tug Jim smiled up at him and said, "Down here."

Jim's heart practically quivered in his chest with anticipation. To share this with Spock was incredible. To give his stoic Vulcan some sense of this holiday and what it meant to him was wonderful. He could only pray that Spock would appreciate it in the sense in which he meant it. Spock looked down and then finally knelt at his side. Did he realize how important this was for Jim?

"Jim," Spock whispered as if he was afraid to break the moment. It was so fragile to be kneeling on the floor next to his Captain, holding hands and gazing up at the dark tree. "Why are you doing this? I recognize the significance of this type of tree but..."

"Ssh," Jim uttered, his head bent. "Just watch." With this said, Jim reached for the switch that he had rigged hours earlier to turn on the lights.

Before the party, he had asked Sulu to have the tree brought in from where it had been grown in the botanical gardens. Once in place, he had pilfered his personal belongings for the ornaments. He had so many that he had accumulated over the years. A few he and his brother Sam had made as they grew up and gave them as gifts to his mother. He remembered the evening, three years ago when he had packed his bags to come aboard the Enterprise. His mother had handed him a box and when he'd opened it, he had been speechless. Looking into her bright eyes, he'd said, "Mom, I can't take these." She had given him one of her soft, loving smiles and said, "Son, these should go with you wherever you go. They're a reminder of all that you have been and all that you will be. Make sure that you use them to share the love that they represent, with those that you love."

True to her words, he would share them now with the only man in the universe, who held his soul in his hands. That is what this strong, elegant and stoic man had become to him. Even if things never changed and Spock could not truly be his in every way, he was still infinitely precious to Jim. He could not help the need to share this gift with him. Turning the switch to the 'on' position, he did not watch the lights as they came on. He turned instead, to watch Spock's face and what he saw there was priceless.

Spock blinked once and then again. His beautiful brows arched in surprise; his features for once completely unguarded. He took in a long, deep breath, unconsciously murmuring "Oh" and then reached out to caress an intricately woven ornament of gold and silver in the shape of an angel. The multicolored lights twinkled off and on in varying patterns, lending a soft ethereal quality to the Vulcan's features.

Spock turned to Jim, his eyes still round and dark. Hesitating in a way that Jim had never seen before, he seemed unable to respond for several heart beats and then finally he said breathlessly, "Jim...it is beautiful."

Warmth rushed through Jim's chest at this and he added, "Merry Christmas, Mr. Spock."

Gazing back up at the tree and then again at Jim, Spock nodded once in agreement.

Shaking his head slightly in an effort to pull himself away from those mesmerizing dark eyes, Jim squeezed the Vulcan's hot hand and then leaned back. Standing he murmured, "Would you like a brandy?"

"Yes, please," Spock responded without hesitation, turning back to the tree. He seemed hypnotized by the lights. Jim smiled at that. He remembered how as a child the Christmas lights on a tree had had a mesmerizing effect on him. He remembered sitting on the couch into the wee hours of the morning, staring into the lights and feeling warm and safe. He was very glad that Spock seemed now, to appreciate them as much as he had back then.

He walked quietly through their shared bathroom and into his cabin. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this satisfied. Once he realized that Spock had never really had a Christmas, he couldn't help the need that arose in him to make this one special for the Vulcan.

He'd called on Sulu as soon as he'd gotten to his quarters earlier in the day and asked for the tree. That call led to one from Sulu to Uhura, to tell her what the Captain had in mind. Within minutes, Jim had heard from Uhura, Janice and Christine, all eager to come over and help in some way. They had quickly agreed that Uhura would keep an eye on Spock once he got to the party and that both Janice and Christine would help him decorate the tree.

As he poured their drinks, he remembered how Christine Chapel has wanted to stay and share the experience with them but Jim had convinced her that Spock would be embarrassed by the attention. The truth of the matter was that he'd wanted them to have this experience all to themselves; just him and Spock.

As he strode back into Spock's cabin, Jim felt a rush of heat go through his loins as he recalled the sight of Spock dancing with Uhura. What a vision that had been. He'd forgotten what a vixen that woman could be. He'd have to keep an eye on her. But it was the look that Spock had given him from across the dance floor that made his heart pound in his chest. He'd never seen Spock so attractive. How could he not know the effect that he had on Jim?

He'd turned it over in his mind so many times in the last several months and was still amazed by the fact that what had begun as such a tentative friendship, had deepened into the most important relationship of his life. Standing there watching Spock, who still knelt in front of the tree, he felt a lump form in is throat. There was no one else in the entire galaxy that meant as much to Jim as this man and there was no where else that he would rather be right now.

In some ways, these intense feelings for another man had frightened Jim at first. At times he was disgusted with himself over his feelings. Sometimes he felt like a heart sick little boy and he'd admonish himself for going and falling in love with someone who could not possibly return his feelings in quite the same way. Oh there was no doubt that Spock cared for him. He'd seen it in everything that the Vulcan did for him. Jim couldn't help but notice the quiet concern from Spock when he was troubled, the slight tilt of his lips when Jim teased him or how the Vulcan insisted on putting himself in harm's way any time that Jim was threatened. And all of those responses from his Exec only worked to keep him hopeful that maybe some day, Spock would look at him and see how he truly felt.

Padding softly back over next to Spock, Jim dropped back down to his knees and held out a brandy glass.

Spock seemed to have to drag himself away from staring at the tree to retrieve his brandy from Jim's hands. "Jim," Spock murmured softly, "It is fascinating how the random pattern of the lights on the tree, draw the eyes and the mind."

Taking a sip of his brandy, Jim's thoughts turned back to the party and Spock's behavior on the dance floor. "Spock..." he started and then stopped. He was hesitant to bring up his Exec's behavior, but he could not possibly hold down his curiosity. "I was amazed at your dancing...especially the Andorian piece." It was hard to tell in the dim light but Jim thought that he saw Spock's ear tips go dark green.

After a few moments, Spock turned dark curious eyes to Jim and asked softly, "Jim, why would you go to such trouble as this for me?"

Jim moved closer, almost brushing the Vulcan's shoulder with his own and said, "Spock...to some Christmas is a very special time. It's a time step back and take a good look at what we have been blessed with in life. A time to show the special people in our lives how much we care for and appreciate them. It's a time to reflect on our lives and think of the happy times we've shared with those people."

Fine dark brows rose slowly in surprise as Jim tried to explain to him how he felt and then a crease of confusion furrowed between them. "So you are saying," Spock asked, "that I am special to you?"

Still meeting his eyes, Jim felt his heart rate pick up again. He could feel Spock's warm breath caress his cheek; he was so close to him now. One deep breath infused him with the scent of the man sitting before him. It was a scent that was difficult to decipher; somewhere between cinnamon and fresh ground coffee and it heated his blood. "Yes, Spock," Jim answered firmly. "I mean to say that you are very special to me."

Spock's stoic gaze held his for a minute and a shiver of fear ran up his spine. Would he turn away now? Had Jim gone too far into emotionalism for his Vulcan's comfort? And then Spock did something that he had only imagined in his dreams. Spock slowly looked down, then back over at the twinkling lights of the tree and murmured. "You are very special to me too Jim."

Jim could only continue to stare at the magnificent man before him. So strong and steady, he was the rock that Jim clung to in every storm and the home that he had never dared to hope for, all in one astounding package. Spock was everything that he needed in his life to make him complete and now, although the thought of telling him exactly how special he was, made his heart squeeze with fear, he realized that the moment had come for total honesty between them. Just once, Jim told himself, I have to tell him how I really feel or I'll regret not doing so, for the rest of my life. "Spock," he called in a breathless voice.

Spock turned back toward his Captain to meet golden eyes that seemed to shimmer with affection. Hearing that Jim considered him special and an important part of his life had turned him inside out. He had never in his life felt what he felt now. With those words, Jim had erased any lasting shreds of fear that Spock had ever felt about displaying emotion to this man. Jim was T'hy'la to him in every way. Never with anyone, had he felt so cradled in the arms of total acceptance. It was a comfort that he had never thought he would feel in his life and it took his breath away and freed him.

"Jim," Spock whispered in anticipation of what his Captain would say next. It seemed that tonight would continue to be a night of revelations.

Leaning to within inches of his face, Jim set down his drink and lifted on cool hand and placed it on his chest. "I love you," he said in such a low and breathy tone, that for a moment Spock had to repeat the syllables to himself to decipher the words that been spoken. And then the words became a mantra that drummed in his head and roared through his veins like brandy, intoxicating him with heat and sweetness. He was astounded by the courage of the man before him.

His eyes were drawn down to soft, pale lips that at this moment were held slightly apart in both fear and anticipation. His nostrils flared as he drew in Jim's warm invasive scent of dark, rich honey. And in that instant, Spock's mind finally succumbed to the beat and breadth of his heart. All that he could think, kneeling there, his gaze roaming over the fine golden features of the man before him was that he had to taste this mouth and lay feathery kisses along these brows. All he could reason was that the coolness of Jim's mouth would complete him and everything that he was, ached for that completion.

Taking the hand which still lay upon his chest into his own, he kissed the tender skin along the palm and then surrendered to his overwhelming needs and slid his tongue along the fine lines that he found there. The taste of Jim's skin was everything that he had imagined that it would be, the slightly salty flavor igniting his senses.

Jim gasped at the contact of Spock's hot, rasping tongue on his palm. //Oh sweet heaven! // he thought as his eyes squeezed shut and his head dropped back. Although he had been half aroused all evening, the feel of that fiery wetness as it moved along his thumb and then up to circle the veins in his wrist made him agonizingly erect. "Oh, God, Spock," he moaned, "Please..."

Spock took one look at the stunning site of Jim, head thrown back in pleasure, gasping for air and without conscious thought, he reached forward to grasp his waist and drag him forcefully against his chest. Pulling his legs out from under him, Spock set Jim back on the floor and then in a frenzy of movement, he parted his legs with the thrust of one knee. Jim stared up at Spock braced over him and reached up to sweep his dark hair aside, the silken strands caressing his fingertips. "You're so beautiful," he said softly.

Spock's eyes glittered in the semi-darkness and when he spoke his voice was gravely. "As are you, Jim."

Reaching back to cup his neck Jim pulled him down. "Please kiss me," he pleaded. Allowing himself to be pulled forward, Spock sank between Jim's knees and with a smile answered, "Yes."

Fiery hot lips grazed cool softness once and then again. Spock felt like he was melting inside as his groin slide against Jim's hard erection and with a moan he parted Jim's lips and plunged into his mouth. Pressing his full weight into the firm body beneath him, Spock slid his hands down Jim's sides and then reached further to cup his buttocks and grind their hips together. He was so incredibly hard and his mind was awash with need. Capturing Jim's tongue between his lips he sucked hard, wanting to draw every last ounce of his taste into his mouth. Jim was like nectar on his tongue and instantly he was addicted. He would never want the taste of another.

After several minutes of kissing and grappling in an attempt to climb into each other, they were both forced to come up for air. Jim was the first to find his voice as they lay buried in each others necks, both breathing hard. "Where in the hell did you learn to kiss like that?" he asked in a bemused tone.

Spock sighed deep in his chest and straightened to gaze at his beloved's face, whose soft lips were swollen from their passionate kisses. "I have never kissed anyone in this way," he said caressing Jim's cheek, "It is as if, I can not get enough of your taste in my mouth." Then leaning back down, he captured those lips again.

"Mmm," Jim murmured as he pulled back again. "I feel the same way Spock. You taste like dark rich chocolate."

Spock frowned for a moment, contemplating his words and then lifted an eyebrow. "Most likely it is a remnant of the dessert that I had during the party this evening." Then with a slight nod he added, "You do recall that it was named 'Death by Chocolate'. It was exceptionally rich and I should not have allowed myself to indulge but then again...you did insist."

Jim couldn't help but grin. "Ah yes, now I remember. I knew that you wanted it and I leaned into you and told you to try it, just once."

"Does that mean..."Jim started, leaning forward and capturing those hot lips again for another taste, "that if I ask for anything tonight in the same way, you'll do it?"

Jim lay back again and rubbed his Exec's shoulders as he slide his erection back and forth over Spock's. "In that case...take your cloths off mister, just this once."

"Yes, Sir," Spock responded as he pulled himself upright and removing his tunic.

Jim watched, his blood pounding through his veins. First went the tunic, revealing Spock's wiry frame, dark hair swirling across his chest and nipples in an enticing pattern which led down into his pants. Jim felt dizzy with the anticipation of seeing where that fine line led. Undoing the snap on his pants, while continuing to watch Jim's eyes, Spock pulled the zipper down slowly and then slid his thumbs under the waist band. As he slide the pants down to his knees, Jim couldn't help but lick his lips as he took in the enormous erection that stood straining against the regulation black briefs.

Then suddenly, as if snapping himself out of some trance, Jim sat up and yanked his shirt over his head. "Hurry," he said once as he moved urgently to undo and then remove his own pants. Spock let out a deep chuckle that he could no longer hold back and sat back onto the floor to remove his boots. The last to go were his briefs and when he looked back up, it was to find Jim standing naked by his bunk, his eyes fixed on Spock's erection.

"Yes," Spock said, as he got to his feet and stepped up to take his T'hyla back into his arms. The meeting of naked flesh on flesh was exquisite, as was the fall down onto the bunk. Spock lay between his Captain's knees once more, but the feel of their erections pressing hard and slippery from their arousal against each other, was almost more than he could handle. "Oh," escaped between his lips as he felt Jim's cool body surround him and then again as strong hands cupped his buttocks and pulled them together tight. Leaning down to nip and then lick Jim's chin, Spock was lost in sensation. Running his tongue along the strong jaw line, he lifted his weight onto his hands and pulled back just far enough to be able to reach Jim's rosy nipples. He took one gently between his teeth and at the hiss that this move elicited from his lover, he clamped his lips over the erect nub and sucked it into his mouth.

Jim couldn't believe that this was finally happening. Running his hands through Spock soft hair, he moaned and then pulled the dark head tighter against his chest. "Yes," he gasped. Spock released the one nipple and moved to the other, taking it into his mouth and then laving it with his tongue until it was as tight and hard as the other.

Bucking his hips at every lick and pull on his nipples, Jim felt his groin tighten unbearably. "Oh yes, Spock," he moaned. "Please kiss me again." Spock reached back down to grabbed his ass and started to grind forcefully into his hips, as he moved to first suck on Jim's lower lip and plunge back into his mouth.

Jim was so close. He could feel the beginnings of his climax as it climbed up through his legs and into his groin. Urgently, he grabbed Spock's hips harder as he drove himself against his sweet hot cock and rough hairy belly. They were both gasping now. Kissing hard and deep and then pulling away to breath before kissing again. "Harder," Jim pushed between clinched teeth.

"Yes," Spock moaned as he raised himself back up onto his hands and clutched at the sheets, the muscles in his arms bulging. Everything in his mind and body was focused on the feel of his hardness pressed into Jim's groin and belly. This desperation for release was both frightening and exhilarating. The musky scent of their passion drove him higher and harder as he rose toward completion.

Jim was determined to keep his eyes open. His only desire at this moment was to see Spock find release. "I love you," left his lips as he watched Spock's arms and neck tighten. The sight of Spock, head thrown back, his body tight as a bow and his mouth hanging open in pleasure was almost more than he could bear. His struggle for completion, made Jim's heart tremble in his chest as did Spock's groan of, "Oh, Jim!"

"Yes Spock...cum for me," Jim urged thrusting faster against his lovers hips. And then it happened. Spock looked down, his eyes piercing Jim with passion before they squeezed tight and his rhythm faltered. One thrust and then another and his entire body began to tremble. "Ahh," tore itself from his lips as his seed spilled like molten lava over their bellies. The sight and smell of Spock's release was all that Jim needed to push him over the edge.

"Spock," he gasped once and then groaned loudly as he emptied himself, the orgasm rolling through him like thunder. Unending waves of pleasure lapped over him again and again.

Jim lay open mouthed and panting on his back. Reaching forward, Spock brushed a few sweaty strands of dark, honey hair back from Jim's forehead. When the movement failed to elicit any response from his T'hy'la, Spock grew concerned. "Jim?"

Jim moved his lips but no sound came forward for a few moments and then he grunted, "Huh."

Running his hand over the soft, silken clad muscles of Jim's chest, Spock asked, "Are you alright?"

Jim traced his tongue over his lips to wet them and then said, "Mmm hm." Then opening his eyes, he turned to gaze first into Spock's eyes and then down his beautiful lean body. "Damn," he exclaimed as a brilliant smile came over his features, "that was unfucking believable."

Spock gave one of his warm half smiles and blushed a dark green. Lifting one superior eyebrow, he struggled to make his voice sound stern. "I do not believe that 'unfucking' is truly a word.

Still smiling Jim shifted onto his side to face Spock, his heart full to bursting. "Oh, yes it is, First Officer."

Shaking his head Spock said, "I must disagree," and then called out, "Computer."

Gasping in surprise and then laughing in delight, Jim shouted over the computers acknowledgement, "Computer off!" and lunged up and over Spock's form, to straddle him. "You're so bad," he exclaimed.

Nodding assent, Spock could not help the full smile that came over his lips. And then gazing from Jim's face slowly down over his chest to his hips, he teased, "You have yet to discover to what degree I can be 'bad', T'hy'la."

"Hm," Jim murmured as he leaned down to kiss those hot, full lips. "I'll just bet that's true," he said right before he took hold of Spock's head and pulled him up for a deeper taste.

They kissed slowly and gently for several minutes until passion once again took them in hand. Hours later, as they lay spent and sated, Jim thought back to what had brought them together tonight. Lifting himself up on one elbow, he leaned over Spock's chest and then down to place a loving kiss on his shoulder. "Merry Christmas, Mr. Spock."

Spock looked into his eyes and then casually used his immense strength to lift and flip Jim around so that he could spoon him from behind. Pressing himself into Jim's cool softness, he gazed at the tree over his T'hyla's shoulder. Jim could feel his lover's contentment run through him like sunlight and he too gazed at the tree as he nuzzled back into Spock's inviting heat. Warm breath caressed his ear and then Spock whispered, "Merry Christmas, Jim." With a sigh, Jim felt sleep begin to overtake him and just before he surrendered to it, that same deep voice said, "I love you." Smiling to himself, Jim finally drifted off to sleep in the firm knowledge that tonight; all was right with the universe.

Just Once

by T'Mara; rated NC-17 Summary: This Christmas, everyone seems intent on getting Spock to try something new. Disclaimer: Paramount/Viacom, blah blah. No infringement intended, no money being made. FB: smesugar @ aol.com

by T'Mara; rated NC-17
Summary: This Christmas, everyone seems intent on getting Spock to try something new.
Disclaimer: Paramount/Viacom, blah blah. No infringement intended, no money being made.
FB: smesugar @ aol.com